New names and more blogging

Today a friend introduced me to a new blog. The lady who writes it cracked us up! She just says things, much like I do, except I use cleaner language. In reading this blog said friend and I decided that I needed to give names to those in my family and blog more about them. So, here I am starting by giving you the names of my family members and promising more blog posts about them!

Me - The Cultivated One
Husband - The Y Factor
Son #1 - Soldier Boy
Son #2 - The Instigator
Daughter #1 - The Deviant
Daughter #2 - The Eccentric
Daughter #3 - The Informant

Now, if you know me and my family, don't give it away and say their real names! i am going to do my best to keep this up and give you more stories from the Stout House!

My little boy....

...is all grown up. I was shocked to see how much he had matured in 9 short weeks away from home. I know the military requires one to grow and mature quickly as I've been there, but to see my sweet boy being so grown up tugged at my heart. Maybe it's because it doesn't seem possible that he is already grown and it seems like just yesterday he was the sweet faced 9 year old who told tall tales about his life in Germany as a toddler. Maybe it's because he looked so much like his daddy that it took me back 18 years to when he was the chubby faced little blonde baby I've only seen in pictures. Or, maybe it was because in the middle of our time together he looked at me and almost in tears asked me to just make a tough decision for him so he wouldn't have to.

What I do know is that I am so proud of him. For making a life choice and sticking with it despite opposition. For being the best soldier he can be even when he is tired. For following the drill sergeants instructions even when they don't make sense. For making even more life choices knowing the whole list of consequences. For being brave enough and strong enough to fight for his country that he loves. For realizing that there will always be hard decisions to make and that he can always ask his parents. For remembering how important faith is and attending church even when no one he "knows" is watching. For so many other things.

In 31 days he will go through a ceremony and receive his Infantry cord, and in 32 days he will graduate from his training and be an Infantryman. We aren't 100% sure what will immediately follow that. He doesn't have orders to a specific post yet, but that's okay. We will take the next steps like we have taken the first....with prayer and believing that God is in control.

Where's Waldo....Uhhhh....I mean Dave?

So, my son left two weeks ago for Army Boot Camp. He is in Fort Benning, GA learning all there is to know about the Army, it's core values, and what it means to be a soldier. Can I just say that as much as I miss him, I am so extrememly proud of him! Anyway, yesterday we got a letter from the Commander of his Battalion telling us all about what they have been doing and what we, as parents, can expect. We also got a link to the training facebook page. I have enjoyed scrolling through the pictures trying to find David Jr. He is in the picture here...there is a bit of a discussion going on as to which one he is, but he is in the picture :)

This past week....

the kids and I visited the hubby in Clarksville, VA where his new job is. Let's just say it didn't take me long to fall in love with the quaintness of this small town! From the historical homes to the lampposts and benches along main street....there was not much that I didn't love about this town. The people were so friendly too! They were helpful and welcoming.....it was so lovely!

This was my FAVORITE house!


Isn't it great?! It has been in the same family forever....but a little birdie told me that it may go on the market since the current generation of owners is not interested in keeping it....I hope David says yes if I ask nicely! :)

And check out the lampposts! LOVE!


There is a huge thrift store at the edge of town that is run by the Ruritans. The proceeds from the shop go to the library, the museum and other such things around town. So, of course I did not mind spending money there :) We got hubby a microwave for $19 that looked like it had never been used and a puzzle for the kids to work. I also got these babies....

Aren't they great?! There are a total of 19 and I only paid $5.50! That's 29 cents each! They are going to be re purposed once I figure out what I want to make them into :)

Our visit was way to short, but loads of fun. I miss my hubby already, but I know we can do this! Now it's time to head to bed because tomorrow I send this kid

off to the Army to serve his country.

Where have the years gone??

That kiddo up there graduates from High School in 2 short weeks! I have no idea how he got that big! When I first met him he was a 9 year old who told big whopper stories, like about how he raced dirt bikes in Germany (he lived there for 3 years....from the ages of 1-4)! He loved to ride in my big truck and he was curious about why I wanted to marry his dad. He was in our wedding and his first words after were "Do I have to call you mom?" I told him no that I was perfectly fine with him calling me Heather....his next words were "ok mom". He has the biggest heart of any teenager I know. He loves people and has never met a stranger. He has filled my life with such joy and I honestly cannot imagine not knowing him.

Maybe that's why my heart is breaking just a little right now. In conjunction with graduation we are throwing the boy a party. We invited all his friends and family and are looking forward to celebrating with him. However, some of his family have decided they don't want to be here. If it were distant cousins it probably wouldn't bother me as much, but it's 2 sets of his grandparents. They have decided that the way they feel about the past is more important than celebrating his future. I am trying really hard not to be bitter or angry about this. I have been praying that they have a change of heart and mind and come anyway. I do not understand their reasoning, and maybe that's a good thing. What I do understand is the way my son feels about it. He is hurt, although he would never show it.

So I end with this.....blending families is never seamless. It doesn't always turn out the way we dream it. All we can do is love each other. Make sure that the kids feel loved by all of us. And put our own feelings out of the way in order for our children to be happy. Life is too short to hold grudges.

Today my son turned....

Where have the last 9 years gone?! He has grown from a slightly insecure 9 year old into a brave, mature, confident 18 year old. I remember the very first time I met him. He was worried I would get mad when he got dirty playing at papa's house. I just laughed and told him that's what kids were supposed to do! The next time I saw him he told me a tall tale about being a dirt bike racer in Germany! This kid! On the day I married his dad he asked me if he had to call me mom. I told him he could call me anything but late to dinner.....he chose to call me mom. I have been so blessed to be his mom. I have only known him half his life, but I could not love him any less. In 3 short months he will be a high school graduate....and a short 2 months later a United States Soldier. I am so proud of this young man!

When we judge...

I think God should immediately allow us to feel what is going on with that person emotionally, physically & spiritually. Just a quick glimpse so that we can feel what they are feeling, good or bad. I think this would cause us to judge less and love more. This thought comes from much thought over a recent incident in my own life. I wonder if things would have happened differently had the person judging been able to feel what I was feeling right then. Am I saying that feelings should outweigh behavior, absolutely not. What I am saying is that sometimes our behaviors are the result of our feelings. How much more sensitive would we be to others if we knew that we would feel what they are feeling? Would we be more willing to just love them in spite of our opinion of them? Or would we judge just to get the gossip fodder? I would like to believe that we would love more. I think it would make us more sensitive to the differences between ourselves and others. I think we would be more accepting of those differences and would work better as a community. Isn't that what we are called to? To be an accepting and loving community?